Allow me to begin by saying that this song is open to very wide interpretation. Songwriter, Neil Finn is on record as saying that he sees it as a song of hope and unity. For the purpose of today’s post, I will accept that assessment because it fits the theme. Read on and you will see what I mean.
There is a certain randomness to the people that enter our lives. Some friendships are fleeting, and others enter your small circle, wrap around your heart and never let go. Each represent a degree of significance in defining who we are. Somehow, through it all the cream always rises to the top and the best of the best remain, even if their presence exists half a world away. Today’s post is dedicated to our beautiful friend Ashlee.
It took a bit of persuasion. Our family friend Tammy was involved with an organization that hosted students from Australia who wanted to visit Canada. On an annual basis a small group would pack up and head over to the ‘true North strong and free’ and because they managed to find hospitable hosts in our area, Burlington became a landing place. Tammy and her sister Connie had been doing this for several years and found the experience to be very rewarding. In fact, she raved about it on many occasions and suggested that Heather and I consider becoming a host family for a couple of months. I was skeptical for several reasons. Most of all, the concern resided with how would a ‘stranger’ fit in to the organized chaos that we called a home?
Regular readers of Ted Tocks Covers will likely note that when big things happen in my world, Heather also tends to be at the root of it. So, after a lot of contemplation and careful organization Heather told Tammy we would be gracious hosts. Tammy in turn, told Heather and I that she would carefully assess the student profiles and pick the one she felt would be best suited to us. This in a nutshell, is how Ashlee landed out of the southern hemisphere and into our world in late November of 2004. That year, there was a group of about seven ‘Aussie girls’ but, between us, Ashlee was undoubtedly the best. Tammy chose well.
Looking back, it couldn’t have been easy. We met Ashlee at the airport as she arrived with the rest of her new friends who were from all over Australia. They were chaperoned by a woman named Moira, as I recall. Because Heather never does anything halfway, we greeted the troupe at the airport with a welcome sign. It was me and Heather along with Sebastian (10), Jeremy (7) and Nathaniel (4). After a short period of formalities, we all hopped into our minivan and drove from Pearson Airport back to our home in Burlington. If Ashlee had any reservations, we certainly didn’t detect her apprehension. It was her and these three boys. It was me, trying my best to relate to a teenage girl. Not entirely my comfort zone at the time. It was Heather who has the uncanny ability to relate to everyone. In no time I could feel a bond forming. As always it began with Heather and filtered down. That is the bond that remains.
The two months that Ashlee lived with us is forever etched in our minds. She took on the role of ‘big sister’ immediately. Her ability to adapt is remarkable. This is a trait that has served her well in life. In order to accommodate Ashlee in our modest three bedroom house, Sebastian moved into the basement where we set up a pseudo family room/bedroom. Ashlee took Sebastian’s room because we wanted to ensure that she had some semblance of privacy. Jeremy and Nathaniel continued to share a room. Out of this setup everything else evolved. Ashlee was literally a part of every family activity and occasion we enjoyed from the moment she walked through our doors. Within a month she was integral in birthday celebrations for Heather, Jeremy and Sebastian. She joined us in our annual Christmas tree expedition that involved us driving way out into the countryside to find the perfect Christmas tree, chop it down and drag it home, bring it into our house, somehow make it stand up and then decorate it with three boys who had varying degrees of interest. In this space, Heather had an ally. When Ashlee detected their commitment was waning, she managed to coax them along. The boys knew they were outmatched. They had to comply. Again, the bond between Heather and Ashlee was real and often unspoken.
I can’t begin to rhyme off all of the things we did during Ashlee’s first visit. What I can say is it introduced me to a world of enthusiasm and possibility. How else can I explain the fact that on New Year’s Day 2005, I ended up running into the frigid waters of Lake Ontario for the annual ‘Polar Dip’ for charity. I was dressed as some form of Captain Canada. Yes, my face was painted with a Canadian flag. I wore the required bathing suit and had a flag draped around my neck, flowing behind my back. Surrounded by countless others we ran as far into the lake as we dared. Me, in my ridiculous attire and Ashlee, naturally dressed as ‘Aussie Girl’. She clearly looked way better than me, and of course, being way more daring ventured further into the water. That defines Ashlee. Immerse yourself in every activity.
What I remember about the day we took Ashlee back to the airport to go home was that it was quiet. To say the boys were sad is an understatement. I know I was. The thing is, I knew Heather was going to miss her most of all. It was interesting, but Heather had always wanted boys and as fate would have it, we were blessed with three, but somehow having Ashlee live with us for just two months made Heather realize how cool it would be to have the perfect daughter. The daughter who in reality would become a friend. That was Ashlee.
When we said goodbye that day there were tears. Among all of us. The ride home was quiet. We didn’t know if we would see her again. Each of us silently hoped we would.
Those of you who don’t know, Australians seem to be natural born travelers. Whenever they want to leave their country, in fact their continent, they need to take a giant leap. To their credit, they embrace the possibilities because if Ashlee is any indication this quality shines through as daring and adventurous. As a result, our family has been the beneficiary of three return visits. Each of these opportunities coincided with major transitions in her life, but to our good fortune Canada emerged as a perfect place for a stopover. When Ashlee left the first time, we told her she always had a Canadian home. Of course, we meant it. To our eternal appreciation she accepted the invitation. A short time after Ashlee left in 2005, she completed high school and went on to Flinders University in Adelaide. Her goal was to become a teacher; a vocation for which she was naturally suited. After graduating, she took on a position at a school in Indonesia. Upon completion of her teaching time in Indonesia, she took on a role at a school in Guatemala. Before heading to Central America, she made plans to come and spend some time with us. When her contract in Guatemala concluded she headed to Chile. Travelling the world in order to realize her dream and gain experience. She kept in touch with us with every change of venue, sharing in the adventure through Facebook messages, posts and occasional phone calls/video chats. We asked her if she was ever going to go back home. She just laughed and said, “not if she can help it, because as soon as she did, she would have to pay her student loans.” Again, that’s Ashlee, intelligent, worldly, adventurous, funny and above all very pragmatic.
The timeline of these teaching tenures and return visits to Canada are somewhat hazy, but with some consultation I think we have got it right. There were two summer visits and one visit over the Christmas holidays.
There are two things we definitely recall. Her most recent trip would have been in the summer of 2015. She was coming from Japan and planning on exploring the west coast of Canada and then make her way to Ontario to spend a few weeks with us. Naturally, we were all in on the possibility. Another visit took place from late November of 2013 into the early part of 2014. It was during this time that she managed to organize her teaching gig in Japan. This would be a life altering experience for her in more ways than one. It was while she was teaching in Japan that she met Andrew.
The idea that two people so perfectly suited could meet almost by chance more than 7000 kms from their home seems remarkable to me. Like Ashlee, Andrew was born with an adventurous spirit and a desire to see the world. He was born in Malawi and early in life moved to Australia’s Gold Coast where he attended High School and University. It was while visiting Japan that Andrew and Ashlee connected and in a short period determined that from that time forward all adventures would be shared. After Ashlee’s teaching tenure in Japan concluded they both took a position working outdoors in New Zealand. This served them both well. Not only were they seeing the world, but Andrew was gaining experience in his field and Ashlee, ever the renegade was still able to avoid paying her student loans.
All kidding aside, the ultimate goal was to find a locale that offered them both opportunities in their chosen vocations. Because they always had their eye on the next destination this opportunity presented itself in Mutijulu where they presently reside. Mutijulu is an Indigenous Australian community in the Northern Territory. It is located on the eastern end of Uluru; commonly known worldwide as Ayers Rock. The tiny community itself is located within Uluru-Kata Tjuta National Park where Andrew works for Parks Australia aiming to preserve the integrity of these hallowed grounds, while Ashlee works at a public school, teaching the area’s indigenous children.
Truth be told, what Ashlee and Andrew do during the week only scratches the surface of what they get up to as a couple. Keeping up with their escapades would be a full-time job for most. Fortunately, Heather and I can see their breathtaking photos and mini journals on Facebook. Occasionally we are blessed with a video chats on Facebook Messenger from a cheery Ashlee who updates us on everything that is going on in their lives. Hilarity often ensues because there is no telling where the conversations will lead. Best of all, we are able to keep in touch. Through this commitment to keeping in touch, we are continually blown away by the places they visit. They seem to be cosmically connected to everything that is beautiful about this planet. They are also endlessly committed to preserving its beauty.
And together they will share in this mission.
Ashlee and Andrew are getting married on Saturday July 10. Admittedly I am over-compensating for the time difference by sharing this post today.
Heather and I, along with Sebastian, Jeremy and Nathaniel and the rest of the Canadian family and friends that Ashlee has established, so desperately wish we could have attended, but over 16,500 kilometers of global space and a wide degree of other factors have prevented this from happening. We will however do everything we can in order to watch via Zoom. In essence, we will be there in spirit and most importantly in heart and soul.
Heather and I want to share these words with you. We have always gravitated to this sentiment. They were actually printed as part of our wedding invitation.
Without love in a dream, it will never come true.”
Robert Hunter
Keep on dreaming. The best is yet to come.
To Andrew, today you are the luckiest person on this planet.
To Ashlee, 17 years ago you danced your way into our hearts. We are so fortunate to have you in our lives.
Your Canadian family wishes you continued happiness and we can’t wait until the day we meet Andrew in person. You are a perfectly suited couple. We marvel from afar.
As noted, when it comes to today’s feature song there is a certain connection to the theme. For Neil Finn, it resides over three decades later as one of the most important pieces to an illustrious career. It was this quote that really grabbed me.
There’s a mystery in any successful song like that, really. It has performed amazingly well and traveled incredible distances and seems to be an important song for a lot of people, so we’re just totally grateful for it. I can’t really attribute it to much other than I think occasionally with my writing—and it’s not entirely clear what every line’s about in that song, either. But I think certain doorways get opened, like I was saying—it has a universality about it.”
Neil Finn
There are many external forces at work in the world, but as the deluge flows all around us we need to focus on what is close at hand. You’ve got each other and as this line says, that is where your commitment truly lies.
You’ll never see the end of the road
Neil Finn
While you’re traveling with me”
Hand in hand you will walk the miles. Wherever your travels take you, we know your spirit and zest for life will always prevail.
There are several fantastic cover versions of ‘Don’t Dream It’s Over’. Here is Paul Young from his 1991 release ‘From Time to Time – The Singles Collection’.
In 2015, Canadian singer Diana Krall released an album called ‘Wallflower’ that consisted of cover versions of several pop and rock songs that moved her. ‘Don’t Dream It’s Over’ resides as the closing track.
Later that same year, Miley Cyrus recorded a version of ‘Don’t Dream It’s Over’ with Ariana Grande. There is a perfect symmetry between this offering and today’s post. It was released by Cyrus, as part of her ‘Happy Hippie Foundation’. She created what has become known as the ‘Backyard Sessions’ where she collaborates with special musical guests. It all serves to allow this non-profit foundation to rally support committed to fighting degrees of social injustice. Their primary focus is on challenges facing homeless youth, LGBTQIA+ youth and other populations deemed to be vulnerable and in need of support.
Here is a collaboration between Chris Martin of Coldplay and Eddie Vedder of Pearl Jam. This is from the 2016 Global Citizen Festival. Another demonstration that speaks to global unity and the constant motif in Ted Tocks Covers that music unites people.
As an added bonus, here is Neil Finn on Tour with Fleetwood Mac at Wembley Stadium in London, England just over two years ago. He is introduced by the legendary Mick Fleetwood and drives home the message that ‘Don’t Dream It’s Over’ is indeed a “song of unity”. When Finn is joined on stage by the great Stevie Nicks the song goes to another place.
There is something about a Wembley audience singing along with every word that brings tears to my eyes.
I also cry at weddings on occasion. Today will be no exception.
Ted Tocks Covers 
3 thoughts on “Don’t Dream It’s Over – Wishing our best to a wonderful couple as they continue their walk down the road of life together. #MusicisLife #TedTocksCovers #CrowdedHouse #NeilFinn #PaulYoung #MileyCyrus #ArianaGrande #DianaKrall #ChrisMartin #EddieVedder”